Thems the Brakes

I guess I had to know it couldn’t really go this smoothly. Who was I kidding?

So, I had another u/s and more b/w this morning. My RE was out, of course – it’s Friday. Why work on a Friday?? That's for poor folk. Lucky bastard.

So his replacement, Dr. Dork (Man, he was such a geeky li’l thing! I felt like mine could easily be his first ever cooch sighting.) said that while the follicles are still growing, they’re not quite ready yet, so I’m going back on Sunday for another u/s and we’ll know more then.

He also said that my uterus is “beautiful.” It could be because she was his first, but in case he's right, do you think I should enter her into a pageant? I can just imagine the interview portion:

Host: “Miss Vicious Cycle, how would you change the world?”

Miss VC: “I’ve made it my life’s work to form a community with my fellow organs. We are united to fight for a Mercedes in the driveway of RE’s all across the land.”

What I’ll choose not to imagine is the swimsuit competition. Ick.

Anyone watch Dancing with the Stars? Come on, admit it! Anyhoo, my little foray into the world of pageantry got me to Googlin’ and I found out that Drew Lachey and Mario Lopez will be hosting the Miss USA and Miss America pageants respectively. Not respectfully, of course. So much for that show helping their careers.

Happy weekend to all! Good luck getting through Hallmark-induced Hell. Go out to brunch on SATURDAY. Instead of Mother’s Day, I’ll be celebrating El Dia del Dildocam. Wish me good suerte!