Monday, May 28, 2007

May Tomorrow Never Come

I know that's a weird post title for someone whose beta is tomorrow, but honestly there's this small part of me that wants to just stay right here in the 2ww. Here I can imagine the IVF worked and think about names and where we'll put the crib and how we'll tell our parents. Here I can have hope. What if tomorrow the hope is turned to despair? W has decided it worked and is already totally excited. It's so hard to temper my own enthusiasm.

I've got about 15 hours left until the ceremonial stick-peeage. "Hope"fully the results will allow me to keep the hope alive, because I'm pretty scared about how a no will hit me.

8 comments:

Amy said...

Totally crossing my fingers for you Erin. I hope that its happy news for you and your husband.

Sarah said...

hoping for much more excitement and enthusiasm!!

Sticky Bun said...

I know exactly what you mean--sometimes I feel like the 2ww, while somewhat awful in its own right, is the only time of the month when you can really hope that waiting and hoping will finally give way to having and expecting.

But, I really, REALLY hope that this is your month. I will be checking early and often tomorrow and wishing you all the best.

hopeful to hateful in 28 days said...

I hope this is the one!!!!

Ms. Planner said...

Hey E - I SO know what you mean. At least when you don't know, you still have hope. It's almost strangely peaceful in a way. Like the still moment before dawn or night fall. Wow, that's sounds pretty hippie drippy.

You are in my thoughts. And I'll be checking on you tomorrow. I am so wishing for you...

Ms. P

Stacie said...

Beta days are horrible and so stressful! I felt the same way about the end of the tww, too.

Keeping everything crossed for you tomorrow!

Carrie said...

I know that feeling Erin. When I lost my last pregnancy I really put off going for the scan. I had such a bad feeling and couldn't stand the thoughty of having to face the outcome. Of course if the outcome had been different I would have kicked myself for suffering needlessly.

I hope the beta brings rejoicing. I really do.

LJ said...

Very astute observation. It's sometimes the only place where hope can thrive