Sunday, March 23, 2008

31 Weeks.

When we moved to Mar1n County, there was definitely a big part of me that hated leaving the City, especially my beloved neighborhood, the Mission. So much good food, easy public transportation, the "cool factor" and did I mention the food? One thing I knew I wouldn't miss, however, is pigeons. Ick. Ever since I was attached by a flock of them at the SF Zoo as an 8 year old (they wanted my hot dog) I've had a healthy disdain for most birds and especially pigeons.

But now I'm sitting here on my lovely deck and what do I see? Well, here, see for yourself...


Right above my feet there. And sorry to subject you to those suckers again, but I just didn't feel like taking them off the comfy pillow just for the picture. There are actually 3 of the nasty things flying about and it's starting to make me think about heading down to the R0d & Gun Club to see about a bb gun. Of course I doubt that there's a R0d & Gun Club in Mar1n, and I've got shitty aim, so that's probably a bad idea. I'd probably hit one of the guys across the way having the bbq with the crappy music. I'm starting to rethink the idea...

Anyway, don't worry. I hate guns. And I'm lazy. So I'm not going anywhere. I just needed to vent about my annoyance at these obvious city dwellers invading my tranquil suburbia.

Oh jesus. Now my neighbor is out on her upstairs deck with her feral-looking shelter cat. It looks like it would like nothing better than to jump down onto me and claw my eyes out. I thought I was just going outside to blog and enjoy the view and now it's like Wild Fucking Kingdom out here!

Ok, so my little lady just kicked my cervix in sort of a "This blog is about us!" kind of way. Just a second, kiddo! Because first, I have to direct our kind readers to go see the Stickies. They have arrived!!! And they are insanely gorgeous. Congrats to the whole Sticky Family!

Alrighty then! To the Wonder Twins. I am 31 weeks today, which is so cool and so crazy. I can't believe it's already been over a month since I had the weird bout of contractions. I have barely felt any since then, and I've been feeling exceptionally good. SURE, my feet swell up toward the end of the day and SURE I fit in absolutely nothing but tent dresses and SURE I get violent attacks of reflux that leave me gagging and vomurping. But seriously, I am amazed at how good I feel. Just yesterday W and I took the dog up for a nice walk, probably about 2 miles, and then I came home and went swimming. We ran a few other errands, and then watched basketball. I even made dinner! I've been slacking in the cooking department lately, but since it was W's last night in town for a while, I thought he deserved it.

He's off to New York for the week for work. He'll get to hang out with my brother while he's there, so that's cool, but a week is a long time! I always kind of enjoy it when I get a night or two to myself, but a whole week? That's a lot. Aside from fetching me things, he's very helpful with calming my mini-freakouts. I have them from time to time about this whole parenting/twins business.

For instance, last week we had a breastfeeding class. Each couple got a doll to use so that we could practice positioning. The instructor gave me a 2nd doll and when I was trying to hold onto both of them it just wasn't working and I started to hyperventilate a bit. Just having W there to make me laugh a little bit helped diffuse the situation, but still! So scary. Of course it didn't help that the dolls were so disgusting that they reminded me of something an evil MIL would send as a shower gift. And the second doll she gave me had this most menacing Chuckie sort of look happening. He scared me. There were other women in the class clutching those dolls more tightly than if they were the babies themselves. Is it bad that I just set mine on the chair in front of me? They were seriously SO dirty that I was grossed out. I felt better when I saw that the couple next to us had laid theirs face down on the floor. I got the impression that the "clutchers" thought that their skills as a mother would be determined by how lovingly they held onto a dingy classroom prop.

So...not much else to report from here. The pigeons are still swirling.

Oh, here's my gut.

I had an ob appointment on Friday and I only measured 30 weeks, despite being closer to 31 and having measured 36 weeks at my previous appointment. I guess baby positioning and twins can really fuck with the measurement. I have felt them get way huger in the past week or so - their presence is just so much more obvious - so I'm not worried by the weird measurements, but I was freakishly hoping to be way over 40 weeks. I don't know why exactly. The doctor did say that my stomach looked "very big," however. I haven't had time to got to w.ebmd to look up that oh-so-technical term, but I'll just take it to mean things are as they should be...

Ok, really this time. Nothing else to say. Except that I don't want to go to work tomorrow... Kinda goes without saying, though, doesn't it?


The Dunn Family said...

So glad to hear that things are going well, except for the pigeons of course. They are pretty gross creatures!

You will be useless as far as being a hostess after the babies are born, and anyone who expects different is insane. You just take care of yourself and those babies, and the rest will fall into place!

Carrie said...

Let your MIL look after you. She will have to appreciate that your world will be full of babies and nothing else.

Glad you are keeping well. 31 weeks, wow!

LIW (Lady In Waiting) said...

I agree 100% that pigeons are perhaps one of the most disgusting creatures on earth. A politician I used to work for hated the fact that they continued to destroy a sitting area popular with elderly consituents (who vote!) so he tried to create a policy to forbid people from feeding pigeons. It made him a laughing stock for a while but my coworker was stuck doing the research on them and we learned that they reproduce like rats! And the more food they have, the more - and faster - they reproduce. So that neighbor of yours with the ferrel cat better not be feeding those creatures or you will have more very soon.....

I have already started wondering if/when my MIL will come visit after Little Life is born (assuming he/she makes it, of course - I am only 12w4d) And I am dreading it. My only hope is that she won't stay at our house because I am CERTAIN she will still expect Mr. LIW to wait on her and cook for her, etc. PLUS she is a slob so I end up running around cleaning up after her. I would probably lose my mind if I had to do that with a newborn on my arm. And if I end up with PPD, I might hurt her. But she will deserve it, right? :-)

Glad to hear that the twins are doing well!! You are definitely in the home stretch now....


Ms. Planner said...

Oh I CANNOT STAND pigeons either. In fact, most birds kind of piss me off.

I always love your fun posts. I am laughing just imagining you trying to faux breast feed the Chucky doll. Hilarious.

I'm hoping your MIL will rise to the occasion. In the meantime, stock up on some boxed wine just in case. (And antibacterial wipes in case she bequeaths anymore *heirlooms* to you).

Geohde said...

I'm always a sucker for belly pics :)

Lookin' good!


Leah said...

Thanks for the update, I've been desperate for some data. I'm so jealous that you can still go on 2 mile hikes -- no wonder your kids are considered the Wonder Twins... you're a freakin' superhero! I can't even walk from the parking garage to my desk at work without having 8 or 10 BH contractions. Not fun at all.

That is some crazy shit that you measured 30 weeks. Think the babes were sucking in their guts -- can they really grasp the concept of vanity even in the womb? Verrrrry sophisticated and highly intelligent kids you have there, E. Meanwhile, your belly is fantastic!! I should post a picture but I just feel so gross about the multiple chins I've obtained recently that I'm horribly afraid they'll overpower the snapshot. (As if I couldn't crop my ugly-ass head right out or anything!)

Good luck with the MIL. Since I'm having a scheduled c-section, they'll be here a few days prior to the big event so they can tend to Megan. What's funny is that I wanted my MIL to come earlier and stay longer than she offered to. Crazy, no? Worse yet is that I'm forever in fear that MY MOTHER is going to want to come "help out." I'd rather slather myself in honey and roll in a red ant hill. Surely I'm going straight to hell for saying that but it's the truth.