A Yuletide List Like No Other

Things you shouldn’t have to endure during a holiday party, but since it was a FAMILY holiday party you should have known you were in for:

1.) Having to drink the same thing as the 4 year olds – a Shirley temple.

2.) Watching your mom constantly pester your husband about her ever changing music volume needs. (Were we really the only people at the party with an iPod? Or are we just the only ones nice enough to agree to be in charge of the music?)

3.) Being the only sober one among 35 drunken adults and 15 sugar-crazed children.

4.) Seeing your mom sit on your husband’s lap. Just because he’s dressed as Santa don’t make it right.

5.) Having your (usually lovely and appropriate) stepsister, in an effort to explain why she thinks you’re having boys, jam her fingers WAY up your business several times to describe just where she thinks girls are carried.

6.) Only having the tray of rock shrimp corn fritters come by twice

7.) Being told in one 5-minute conversation that a) you’ll never wear those (hot!) shoes again b) your pregnancy is all downhill from here and c) your life is over.

8.) Having to pretend that the fact that as children grow, their clothes take up more space is news to you.

9.) Being told first that you look pregnant and second that you don’t look at all pregnant, and being irrationally upset by both comments.

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In other news, I think I felt some baby movement on Saturday! W and I were out shopping and on the way home I collapsed onto the BART seat and felt the sort of popping fluttery feeling that I've read about. Nothing since then, but I think it was just one of them standing up and applauding for finally getting a rest after about 4 straight hours of shopping.