Thursday, January 3, 2008

Laughter through puke is my favorite emotion

I’ve been putting off posting because I have all these mini thoughts, but nothing cohesive enough to count as a real post. Today I say fuck that, because it’s only a matter of time before these thoughts vaporize in my twin-addled brain. So, in no particular order of importance or interest, here’s what’s going inside my head (and other parts of me…)

First things first, I will join the ranks of knocked up types out there and post a belly shot. Here I am at 19 weeks, 3 days. Please pardon the severed head syndrome, but W was adamant that I don’t post my head here. I did leave my chin(s) so you can see how short my hair is.

Pregnancy Issues (Physical):

-Restless leg like ya read about. Luckily enough it seems to flare up not when I’m in bed, but when I’m sitting at my desk, on the bus or on the couch. It’s really been interfering with my ability to concentrate on Project R.unway, so even though it’s not keeping me from sleeping, I’m going to have to categorize this as a major problem. I have found that taking a bath helps, so I’m going to do that more often for sure.

-Intermittent heartburn. NOTHING like it could be, so really I’m lucky on this front.

-Again I think I’m lucky here, but rather than constipation, I’ve got consta-poopin’. Seriously 3…4… times a day. I guess that’s a good thing!

-I’m going to need to buy new shoes. My favorite black boots are a) too small and b) too old (ratty), and now my other shoes are all getting too small as well. My boots have even been leaving marks around my calves which means I’m on my way to some lovely cankles – yay! I’ve started taking my arch supports out, which is helpful because then my shoes fit better, but then not so much because my feet are fucked up and I need the arch supports. Argh.

Pregnancy Issues (Mental):

-I have a clothes fit every single morning. I am so sick of looking like a frump and it’s only going to get worse from here! I just ordered a couple new things from AT Loft, so hopefully that will infuse a bit of life into my dreary get-ups.

-I’m still in disbelief that this is happening. Yes, I’ve registered and yes, I’ve got a crib up in our second bedroom, but I cannot for the life of me connect any of it to the fact that two human beings are going to live in my house and expect me to care for them. We’ll see someone with a double stroller and say, “Hey that’s us!” but it doesn’t feel even slightly real. We test drove cars last weekend and when I tried to envision the salesman in the backseat into two babies it just didn’t compute. (We're thinking H0nda Pil0t by the way.)

-In less than 3 weeks I will be 35. I’ll cross into oldpregnantladyville. No offense intended to those over 35 already, but this is a serious milestone in my mind. I know 50 is the new 20 or whatever, but 35 is really inching toward middle age. I almost never worry about my age, but this one? Hurts.

Random Good Bits:

-I got the Sn0ogle a week or so ago and LORDY! I have been sleeping so much better! W is not a fan of the “chastity pillow”, as he calls it, forming a wall between us, but I am in love.

-I’m going to Boston for the last weekend in January for a shower that my best friend is putting on for me! I can’t wait to see all my east coast peeps and have one last (for a while) girls’ weekend. My stepsis is hosting a shower out here in March, so I am definitely a lucky girl.

-Moving to our new place was so smart! We love it and the indoor pool has been so great. I love love love it!

Random Funny Stuff:

-W and I were at the grocery store when my friend called. She was suggesting bringing dinner over to our house, so of course I was all ears! As we were chatting I saw a display of commuter coffee mugs. Since I’m in need, I grabbed one and proceeded to stow it away in my PURSE. I just went on yammering away to my friend about the evening’s plans. Once I finished W just gave me this look and said, “You wanna go ahead and put the mug in our basket?” I had NO idea I had basically stolen the thing. Thanks be to hay-soos he was there!!

-My gag reflex is still really quick. Mostly if I’m coughing or laughing a lot I’ll gag a bit. Nothing ever came of it….until the other night. We had a perfect Saturday of not doing much aside from hanging out by the fire, playing scrabble, and eating some tasty crockpot chili. Just as we were snuggling (snoogling?) into bed, W made me pay for the chili by letting rip what seemed like a pretty tiny fart. However, what it lacked in amplitude it made up for in disgusting smellitude. I started laughing and saying, “Man, that’s terrible!” and then all of a sudden the gagging began and before I knew it I had thrown up in my mouth. I ran to the bathroom and unfortunately the laughing turned hysterical just as I made it so there I was laughing my ass off while puking. It was not pretty. But I couldn’t stop laughing! I mean, we’ve all said, “Ew that’s nasty, I’m gonna puke,” but how many of us actually do?

Sorry to end on that note, but that’s all I got. Oh - OB appt next Wednesday and then a peri/u/s appt on 1/17. Woo hoo!

11 comments:

nickoletta100 said...

My DH hates my snoogle too :) But I agree, I love it and couldn't side sleep without it!!!

Jen said...

Sounds like things are going fabulous for you! Congrats! Except on the smelly fart-gag thing. :)

Unknown said...

Ha, Ha LOL! That was a funny fart/gag/puke story. Happy New Year.

AwkwardMoments said...

You look GREAT!!!! Fantastic if you will!
I am so glad you shared all those stories with me. And glad you like the new place. 2 friends have that car you mentioned and absolutely love/adore it.

Ms. Planner said...

Cowboy recently made me puke from the same thing! I didn't think it was so funny though. You are a way better sport than I am :)

Meghan said...

Beautiful pic! What a great little belly!

And that story is just too funny. I can totally see my husband doing something that disgusting!

Geohde said...

Great belly shot. Even headless!

xx

J

RBandRC said...

Glad to hear that things are progressing beautifully. What a cute belly shot! :)

Anonymous said...

Hilarious about the puking b/c of a fart. :)
I had a laughing/puking episode brought on by some carsickness and a "lovely" breakfast at Denny's. Ew!
Love your blog.

Cibele said...

loved the fart story. Just too funny!

Mama Bear said...

Great pic! And I'm so glad the new place is working out! (I so wish I had a pool. :-)

I haven't broken down and gotten the snoogle yet. Instead I've built a pillow fort that seems to work. But maybe I should suck it up and get one...